CSWH Chapter 10: Sword and Pride
“Melly, I have something to talk to you about. Come to my study.”
During the time when I doing my daily training.
Father called me, so I temporarily stopped training and headed towards the study.
Those from the Military would come by two or three times a week.
On the other days, father was also busy, so I would practice on my own.
From morning until evening, there were plenty of things to do, whether it be improving on my basic physical strength, confirming my posture and all kinds of other tasks.
Until recently, I had been training together with my older brother. However, lately, after finishing with the usual training, he has been holing up in his room studying.
It seems that in addition to the many topics he had to learn as the next lord, brother has also been learning tactics recently.
When I asked him not to work so hard to the point of collapse, I was told, “You too”, as he gave a troubled laugh while pointing at my wounds.
Ever since mother died, all of us have been like this.
It was as though a single portion of our hearts had frozen over.
And as if we were trying to submerge it, each of us wholeheartedly threw ourselves into some task.
For me, that task was training.
Just how long had it been since I last laughed from the bottom of my heart, I wonder.
To begin with, my emotions would not stir.
…….though it was the same for both father and older brother.
Even as time passed since the loss of mother, none of our wounds healed, and we continued to carry them. Not only that, but it was as if they had begun to slowly fester.
When I went to the study, father was making a stern face.
“……I have made you wait, father.”
“Iya, it’s fine. Sorry for calling you during your training.”
“It is alright……what business do you have with me?”
“Umu…….I was thinking of giving this to you.”
What he passed me after saying that, was a sword.
It was slightly slender, but upon examining it, one could see that it was unlike the dulled blades of training swords. One could feel a certain weight in its pointed tip.
Carved on the handle of it was the crest of the Marquis house.
“This sword is……”
“It’s something I had ordered for you…….can you become someone worthy of wielding this sword?”
Father’s sharp gaze shot through me.
A chill rushed through me, and something cold began to run down my spine.
Unlike the swords that I had used up until now for training, this was something for causing harm to others.
He was likely asking whether or not I had the resolution to wield something like that.
……however, what of it.
What I have been learning up until now, no matter what kind of pretty words you try to use, was something for hurting other people.
“……if it’s father, then you have probably already realized, but from the start, the reason why I picked up the sword was to settle my own grudges. That is why, this crest…….I cannot swear upon the name of the Marquis house.”
It was not such a noble desire to protect someone.
I had, for my own sake, taken up the sword, and begun to learn it.
“That is why, I shall swear upon my name. I have pride in the things learned from father, and the many seniors who have taught me up until now, as well as the swordsmanship that I have built up. I will take responsibility so that I do not stain my own pride, and swear to wield my sword by it.”
“You spoke well…….never break those words.”
Offering up the sword, I lowered my head to father.